February 9, 2009

The lonliness begins...

I'm sorry I dont have much to comment on the winter formal thing,however from the pics you posted you ladies look smokin'!!
We are just starting out on this whole med-school experience, since Sonny's acceptance was so recent (He starts in July). He has to go to a sort of orientation ("Emory Revisited") that is spread over three days and its full of tours, seminars, meetings, etc. I wanted to go, so I could find out more about the next four years.
He called me today to tell me that the girl in the admissions office said I "would probably be bored" and that it would be better if I didnt go. Maybe this is silly, but it seems like the separation and lonliness has already begun. Im already excluded from the cool kid's table and I havent even gotten to school yet. What makes it worse, is he has to stay overnight for two nights during this whole ordeal. Like I said in a post, I spent three months without him recently, and I dont like the idea of sleeping alone again. I know some of you are reading this and going "Dude, she needs to buck up!". And part of me is kicking myself as I share this, but I didnt think the lonely nights would start so soon.


Ali and Josh Holt said...

yeah....unfortunately to say...get used to it! My hubby interviewed ( as yours did) for months, then he had to go to Orientation in NC without me cuz I had to stay in Utah for my sisters wedding, so we spent the first week of med school by ourselves. You just have to find a good book, turn up your ipod and try to forget about it! To be quite honest with you, we are almost done with first year, and it has been so easy. We havent spent a night alone since the first week, and I see him a lot. Its year 3 you gotta worry about! :) Try to stay positive, as we all try!!! good luck!

the Jennings secede from the South said...

Once school starts, you will see hubby a LOT because he ain't going out of town or doing much traveling or running around...he's at the house studying! At first, I was super insecure about girls in his class or if I would feel like I was on the outside but I think that communicating those worries or concerns in a supportive way... (i.e. I am so stinking proud of you and excited you're in med school) helped us and we tried to make a plan of attack.

Also, good girlfriends are a must. I am friends with a lot of girls married to med school men up here and that has been WONDERFUL. You feel understood and it's so nice!

Derricca said...

I agree that it won't be as bad as you think it will be. :) For us....the first semester was terrible because he was trying to figure out how he studies best, and I was still working full time with a two year old and no daycare. Now I have cut back my hours some, and my hubby has found that he CAN study at home, and I keep his cup full with hot drinks, and sneek in some smooches from time to time. It helps him a lot!! Really, you will find out, it is the little things in medical school that make things run smooth. Chin up! :)

Katie Cramer said...

I know that they said you would probably be bored.. but I tagged along! It was really interesting to me, to see where my husband would be studying, taking classes, doing labs, etc. Ohio State was great about answering my questions, too. I was like you, I wanted to know what to expect over the next four years! I would say, if you can go, do it! I had a blast, learned alot, and it was something we could do together.

Sharyl said...

Thank you ladies for our comments. I really appreciate your support. I am so glad I joined this blog.

Brittany said...

Hey Sharyl,

My name is Brittany, and I'm the sister of Bethany Glupker (the girl in the beautiful blue dress a couple posts down). I stop by this blog every once in a while to see if there is any advice or tibits I can offer from the other side of things... I'm the one in med school, and my husband is the "tag along." :)

It is hard when it seems like your significant other has a whole other life apart from you. There is definitely a lot of comraderie that happens among med students ... it's like friendships that are formed in the trenches - when you are with people for so much time and going through tough stuff, you learn to identify with each other. However, let me assure you that this in no way replaces the significance of the relationships that we enter school with - our family, friends outside of med school, and spouses (or significant others).

What I love is being able to come home and talk to Jason about things OTHER THAN med school because otherwise it's all I think about all the time. I will admit, sometimes it probably seems like all that is coming out of my mouth is med school stuff... I don't have a life, so I don't have much else to talk about.

I think what is important for you as the significant other of a med student is to make sure you are secure in the Lord. If you are secure in yourself, then you can be there to support your man when he really needs it. There will be many times of doubting, and an "I believe in you," or a "You're going to make a great doctor," will mean the world to him. (I will also second what Camille said about finding girlfriends - super important!!!)

Also, pray for the doctor he is going to be -- and not just when he's not around, but also when you are praying together out loud for dinner or something. I can't tell you what an encouragement it is when I hear my husband pray for me in that way!!!

Anyway, this is a really long comment. I just really want to encourage you that even though it seems like med school is number one in his life right now, you are still the most important encourager he can have. None of our professors tell us "good job," but we still need to hear it.

I hope that helps. If you want to e-mail me back, feel free to at Brittany.hubbell@gmail. Like I said, I love to offer my perspective as a female and wife on the "other side" of things!

God bless,

LittleMissDreamer said...

I just found this blog and while I'm not married to a med. student (yet), I have been dating one for over 6 years. My guy is in his 3rd year, and I can tell you that I shared these same feelings when he first started. Imagine my thoughts when the Guest Speaker at his White Coat Ceremony told him and his classmates (who were seated boy/girl) "Look to your left and to your right. Chances are, you will be married to one of these people." Yikes, that did not help my feelings of adjustment. I felt very excluded at first, like it was an exclusive club that I could never be a part of. But as time went on, I began to fit right in with his friends. It's going to be hard at first because your guy has to adjust to all the changes and work. But once he gets into a routine, you will get to spend more time with him and get to know his friends. I definatly recommend going to as many orientation events as possible because it will make you feel involved and connected to the journey that he (and you) will be taking.