September 3, 2012

Attitude

First of all, I would just like to say how much I appreciate the encouraging vibe on this blog.  While none of us would pretend that life or marriage is easy, the purpose here is to share stories that encourage one another and I really appreciate that.
My husband and I just went through his "last summer."  Unfortunately, because I work for a residency program, summer is my busy season.  We were still able to spend time together and I must admit, I got a little spoiled.  Not only did we have more quality time together, he loves to cook and I rarely cooked a meal this summer.  I thought I was prepared for him to go back...wrong :)  Not only was he going back to school, he had also taken on the role of Christian Student Fellowship president.  I have been assured that role will settle down a little but orientation was a crazy time for him.  The role of chef and house cleaner, on top of a full time job, were quickly mine again. 
This year I decided I was going to stay on top of the house more efficiently and make sure Luke did not have to feel stressed to help out around the house.  Did I mention his goal this year is to study harder?  I have felt pretty good about how well I have been doing on my goal.
"Pride cometh before the fall," right?
I have come to realize that while I have been keeping the house clean and cooking regular meals, I have not had a good attitude about it.  My lack of joy in my work creates stress on Luke and I both.  Turns out, I am a lot more irritable when I am serving out of duty more than blessing and love.  My poor husband is actually one of the most considerate people I know and I was unconsciously acting as if he was super demanding and expecting me to do everything.
While I certainly don't have this down and perfected, it is important for us to remember what a difference our attitude makes in our marriage.  This is actually a major point discussed in the book Prescription for a Doctor's Wife.  Our attitude affects the atmostphere of our home and that is not something to be taken lightly. 
I know Steph has mentioned both of these books before but I would also like to recommend Prescription for a Doctor's Wife and Love Dare.  They both have great tangible ways to practice really loving our spouses. 

6 comments:

from head 2 toe said...

Exactly! Congrats on having a summer! That is super fantastic! Loved your outlook. My husband is on his clerkships right now...so I have to be positive and uplifting over the phone..which is a challenge! I'm going to try to be better though!

bre said...

I too find myself acting out of obligation/duty instead of love. J Is very limited right now in time and his focus is on his rotations and studying for his shelf exams. Chores around the house pile up so fast and I hate to say it, but I occasionally become the "nagging wife" - one that I am sure is not pleasant for anyone to be around. Sometimes I need a reminder that this is just a season. Thanks for reminding all of us to be patient and take things a day at a time.

LoLoMehl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
LoLoMehl said...

I can't believe I'm just finding this wonderful blog NOW...I've been a med school wife since June and would love to join the community! Not sure if this is the correct place to post this...but my email is lomehlmann@gmail.com. Looking forward to reading and chatting with others who understand the ups and downs :)

Michelle Still said...

My husband was excepted to med school about half way through our first year of marriage... March 19th marks two whole successful years! As you can see I am new to both being a wife and a wife of a med student. I also work full time, have an amazing 10 year old boy who happens to love 4 different sporting activities, and we have a dog! :)
Im so glad that I came across this blog. It will be wonderful to join in and read everyones experiences. My email is michelledstill@gmail.com
Cant wait to finally relate to some other wifes!!

best thesis writing said...

well, it's the part of life. yeah, i know how this life is nowadays. everyone is busy finding their own achievements. but it is nice to see you back again. keep blogging and sharing some good thoughts:)