M1. Almost.... Done!

Hi beautiful ladies!

Well, I just wanted to say that I can't believe the first year is almost done. One more month and we've made it through! I feel like I just watched my hubby receive his white coat for the first time. I couldn't be prouder of him right now, honestly. There were parts of this year that almost felt turbulent like the first year of marriage- moments that reminded us to keep communicating, supporting and loving each other unconditionally.

I would love for anyone to share their impressions after the first year and how much life changed for them if at all! Also how about residency? Will it be a sigh of relief or another huge undertaking for another 4 years or so? I would love to know how this whole process has been for everyone, at whatever stage you are at :) I hope it's been good for all of you so far. Sending my love <3 Ashli

Newbie Alert!

Greetings everyone! I thought I would take some time tonight to introduce myself (and my StuDoc) since I have been lurking around for a bit (sounds kind of creepy, doesn't it?!). Also, my blog can be found at www.wifeofamdphdstudent.blogspot.com. Feel free to follow my ramblings!

My name is Julie and my StuDoc is Ryan. We have been together for a little over six years and married for almost two years. We met in college (Ry's freshman year, my sophomore year) and are both currently students. I work full time and go to graduate school part time with graduation just a few weeks away! I will be graduating with my Masters of Education in Interdisciplinary Studies and I currently work in higher education for a University about an hour from where we live.

Ryan is an MD/PhD student at a school in the mid-Atlantic. He has completed his first two years of medical school and is finishing up his first year of his PhD research. He has two more years within the PhD portion of his program and then Ry will transition back to the medical school for MS3 and MS4. Seven years total to obtain both degrees and his PhD is in stroke research. Ryan hopes to then move onto a residency program for Neurosurgery which has been his passion and dream for many many years.

When Ryan was applying to medical school, we had been together for about 3 years. While I knew I loved him, and that he loved me, I was not sure that I would be able to leave behind all of my friends and family to move somewhere to "follow his dreams". I had told Ry to apply to whatever programs he was interested in and not to take my opinions into account. I wanted him to go wherever his heart was set on and if we made it, I would cross that bridge when we got there. Well, wouldn't you know - he proposed while he was on the interview trail and of course, I said yes. A few months later I was packing up everything and leaving behind all I have ever known to begin the journey as a medical spouse.

What a journey it has been! I'm not sure if anyone else has begun to do this however I suddenly have my kindle full of medical books such as "Match Day" and "What My Patients Taught Me". I faint at the sight of blood never mind my huge fear of needles, however I find the books to be a great resource to inform me of what lies ahead and what goes on in the mind of physicians. Any book suggestions?!

Ok.. now a few questions!

1.) In your opinion, when is the best time to start a family? I know this varies from person to person however I am struggling. My heart says "Ahhh! I want to start a family ASAP. Before the PhD portion is done because his schedule rocks!" But the other part of me thinks "Julie - Come on now, you cannot raise children by yourself! He won't be around and his schedule will be horrible. Wait until he is done, done with everything including residency, and try to start a family then." By that time, I will be 35. Any insight?

2.) Residency. What is it like being a spouse of a resident? Any surgery wives out there? I have heard from many that NeuroSurg residency is pretty miserable however some hard and honest feedback is greatly appreciated!

3.) Suggestions for hobbies? It may sound silly however once I graduate and my days of homework are long gone, I would like to pick up an inexpensive hobby! I don't want to drive Ryan crazy or nag him to death for being busy so I would like to try to find something to help occupy my time. I also think it may help me adjust to the hours that come along with these years and I don't want to get into a dark place of resentment for what Ry is doing (although I am fairly sure that this will happen time to time and that it is ok to feel that way.. right?).

Thank you for taking the time to read this and respond to questions if you can!